friendship and forgiveness

Friendship is something I find very important, it helps you grow and become who you are. Back when your a small child your best friend would change day to day. Growing up through your teens its different, you have a group of friends, some fall out and never speak again then some stick with you for the rest of your lives.

I wasn’t in high school much when I was a teen, I had a lot of mental health issues back then and was an even bigger hermit than I am now. But I will say now being in my late twenties I have managed to keep a few of those High School friends. For that I consider myself very lucky to have them still in my life.

In my early twenties I had a group of friends, some were from high school some from nights out. We were a close group, always met up during the week and had nights out at weekends. We always celebrated each other birthdays and as we got older we celebrated bigger things like new homes with partners or engagements.

We were a tight net group, till one friend broke my trust. He was a guy who was going out with one of our friends, we all got on well and had a good laugh together. Till it was discovered that he had a “secret” file on a laptop where he had saved photos of girls. Unfortunately they weren’t random strangers but they were of some of us girls in the group. I don’t want to go into too much detail about the photos but he had copied some snaps from facebook.

Long story short I wanted nothing more to do with this guy anymore but what made it worse was my friend stuck by him. And not only that but all the rest of our friends supported her so they were also stuck with him. With that I cut them all out of my life.

Its been over 2 years since this all happened but recently one of my old friends has reached out to me. She bumped into my ex a few months ago on a night out and he told her everything I had been going through the past year. I didn’t know what to do or what to say. 2 years has been a long time. How quickly can you forgive someone for just letting you go out of their lives?

Receiving that text did get me thinking on things. I know that deep down I will never be close to her again. I do feel sad when I look back at all the hilarious times I had with the group, but I do believe that everything happens for a reason. There is a saying “if I cut you out my life chances are you handed me the scissors” it goes perfectly for how I felt. Its taken 2 years for one to reach out to me. What makes me most upset is that I didn’t do anything to deserve to be treated like that in the first place.

So after many cups of tea and thinking it over, I have decided that yes 2 years is a long time but I’m happy that she reached out to me. She is the only one that has and I’m grateful for that. So many things have happened in our lives the past 2 years and I would love to know what all she has been up to. We will meet up eventually and I do want to put across how the situation made me feel but I am happy to put it in the past. I don’t want to be friends again with everyone in the group but I am happy enough to work things with just the one. I know I will never forgive him for what he done but I am happy with moving on.

Life is too short to hold on to the bad things, sometimes you do need to just let go and move on with your life. I have gained new friends who I will hopefully be friends with for the rest of my life. And I still have my high school friends. It doesn’t matter how many friends you have, like the saying its quality over quantity. And I have some real gems.

Thank you for reading

JustBreathe

xXx

image used from google

 

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